My Childhood Seders
Title
My Childhood Seders
Creator
Jacob Schlitt
Description
"Pesach—Passover—is a very special time of year. And it is supposed to be even more special for children."
Date
2005/2010
Format
application/pdf
Type
text
Language
en
Identifier
1940_SEDERS_I_HAVE_KNOWN
Text
My Childhood Seders
Pesach—Passover-- is a very special time of year. And it is supposed to be even more special for children. It may be a lot of work for mothers, but I wasn’t aware of it. Traditionally, at the Seder, parents tell the story of the Exodus to the children, after the youngest child asks the four questions, beginning with why this night is different from all other nights.
But this is not my earliest Seder memory. When I was a child, the answer to the question Why is this night different from all other nights was: except for the matzah, it wasn’t. If anything, it was like a Friday night. There were no large family gatherings. As always, it was my mother and me. There were the same dishes that we used on Friday night, not dishes that were only used on Passover. And until I went to Hebrew school and learned how to conduct a Seder, there were no prayers, songs or rituals.
Without question, my mother must have missed the tradition of Pesach which was clearly part of her childhood in Vaslui. I have no idea how she celebrated Passover after she came to America. I do know that early on, she concluded that having two sets of dishes was unnecessary, and by extension so was having another two sets of Pesach dishes. She did light candles on Friday nights and holidays, but I have no idea if she said the prayers. She had not gone to Cheder, nor had she learned to read Hebrew.
However, in preparation for Pesach, my mother made all the traditional dishes. I was amazed that she knew how. (She had been apprenticed to a tailor at the age of six and spent the day, from sun-up to sun-down working for him, so there was little opportunity to observe her mother.) Yet, I remember she made gefilte fish, chrain, brisket, tsimmis, chicken, chicken soup, and compot. One Pesach, she even made wine out of raisins! Though we didn’t do the ritual search for leaven, there was no bread in our house during Pesach.
By the time I was 10, I had learned in Hebrew school how to conduct our own Seder. I played the role of both the child and the parent. My mother and I sat at our kitchen table, covered with a white table cloth, and with the good Shabes china. A large plate became the Seder plate arranged according to the Haggadah, and we had wine and matzah-- the works. And we each had a copy of the Maxwell House Haggadah.
My mother lit the candles, poured the wine, and I would say the bruchas, and then I would ask the four questions--the "Fir Kashes" in Hebrew and Yiddish, which I learned in Hebrew School. Our teacher, Mr. Zinder knew that we all came from Yiddish speaking homes, so his treat was to teach his pupils to say the Four Questions in Yiddish as well (which I have been saying at every Seder since.) We would begin: "Tate, ich vil dir fregen di fir kashes," except I would begin: "Mame…" I did the best I could to read the Hebrew. My mother served the meal, and after the meal, I sang the songs we had learned, ending with Had Gadya, One Only Kid. And then L’shana Haba B’Yiruyshalaim! Next year in Jerusalem. My mother’s dream.
So maybe our Seder night really was different from all other nights.
Pesach—Passover-- is a very special time of year. And it is supposed to be even more special for children. It may be a lot of work for mothers, but I wasn’t aware of it. Traditionally, at the Seder, parents tell the story of the Exodus to the children, after the youngest child asks the four questions, beginning with why this night is different from all other nights.
But this is not my earliest Seder memory. When I was a child, the answer to the question Why is this night different from all other nights was: except for the matzah, it wasn’t. If anything, it was like a Friday night. There were no large family gatherings. As always, it was my mother and me. There were the same dishes that we used on Friday night, not dishes that were only used on Passover. And until I went to Hebrew school and learned how to conduct a Seder, there were no prayers, songs or rituals.
Without question, my mother must have missed the tradition of Pesach which was clearly part of her childhood in Vaslui. I have no idea how she celebrated Passover after she came to America. I do know that early on, she concluded that having two sets of dishes was unnecessary, and by extension so was having another two sets of Pesach dishes. She did light candles on Friday nights and holidays, but I have no idea if she said the prayers. She had not gone to Cheder, nor had she learned to read Hebrew.
However, in preparation for Pesach, my mother made all the traditional dishes. I was amazed that she knew how. (She had been apprenticed to a tailor at the age of six and spent the day, from sun-up to sun-down working for him, so there was little opportunity to observe her mother.) Yet, I remember she made gefilte fish, chrain, brisket, tsimmis, chicken, chicken soup, and compot. One Pesach, she even made wine out of raisins! Though we didn’t do the ritual search for leaven, there was no bread in our house during Pesach.
By the time I was 10, I had learned in Hebrew school how to conduct our own Seder. I played the role of both the child and the parent. My mother and I sat at our kitchen table, covered with a white table cloth, and with the good Shabes china. A large plate became the Seder plate arranged according to the Haggadah, and we had wine and matzah-- the works. And we each had a copy of the Maxwell House Haggadah.
My mother lit the candles, poured the wine, and I would say the bruchas, and then I would ask the four questions--the "Fir Kashes" in Hebrew and Yiddish, which I learned in Hebrew School. Our teacher, Mr. Zinder knew that we all came from Yiddish speaking homes, so his treat was to teach his pupils to say the Four Questions in Yiddish as well (which I have been saying at every Seder since.) We would begin: "Tate, ich vil dir fregen di fir kashes," except I would begin: "Mame…" I did the best I could to read the Hebrew. My mother served the meal, and after the meal, I sang the songs we had learned, ending with Had Gadya, One Only Kid. And then L’shana Haba B’Yiruyshalaim! Next year in Jerusalem. My mother’s dream.
So maybe our Seder night really was different from all other nights.
Original Format
application/msword
Collection
Citation
Jacob Schlitt, “My Childhood Seders,” Autobiographical stories & other writing by Jacob Schlitt, accessed April 27, 2024, https://tsirlson.omeka.net/items/show/22.