Everything is Deteriorating
Title
Everything is Deteriorating
Creator
Jacob Schlitt
Description
"I turned on my TV yesterday and saw about half the movie 'Everything is Illuminated' based on the book by David’s Bronfman friend’s brother, Jonathan Safran Foer."
Date
2009
Format
application/pdf
Type
text
Language
en
Identifier
EVERYTHING_IS_DETERIORATING
Text
EVERYTHING IS DETERIORATING
I turned on my TV yesterday and saw about half the movie “Everything is Illuminated” based on the book by David’s Bronfman friend’s brother, Jonathan Safran Foer. I am not sure what Foer meant by the title “Everything is Illuminated.” Is it when someone “sees the light”? Is it like the electric light over the head of cartoon characters when they realize something?
My title is based on the realization that everything is falling apart. And I mean everything! The appliances we use, the clothing we wear, the buildings we live in, and the whole world around us. The most recent example of this phenomenon is the dying of our refrigerator. We moved into our condo five years ago, and were very impressed with the appliances that it contained. I always assumed that appliances would last a long time—maybe 20 or 30 years. (This is a figure I just made up, but it strikes me as perfectly plausible.) Turns out that within a few years after we moved in, the dishwasher, which must have been around 10 years old, died. We replaced the stove and the oven, but that was our choice, not because they fell apart.
Last week, the refrigerator started acting up. There was a problem with the ice maker. Then we noticed that the food was not as cold as it should be, in both the refrigerator and the freezer sections. For some time, the door to the refrigerator did not close properly because it needed a new gasket. But no new gaskets were available. They weren’t being made any more. The last time we had trouble with the ice maker, we called the appliance repair people and they came, and it cost a couple hundred dollars for their visit and a replacement ice maker.
This time we decided to get a new refrigerator. However, our refrigerator is only 28 inches deep, and most refrigerators are about 33 inches deep. It turns out that ours is a “special” refrigerator known as a “counter depth” refrigerator. It took several hours of research on the internet and calling appliance stores to learn that. And I also learned that it is next to impossible to get a real person on the phone when you call appliance stores. The recording goes on endlessly: press one for directions to the store; press two for hours; press eight if you know your party’s extension, and finally, press zero to speak to a customer service representative, but they are never available.
Buying a new appliance, like making any kind of purchase, is a challenge I relish. But this memoir is about how everything is deteriorating. I will write about how I shop for bargains in another piece.
I mentioned how our dishwasher fell apart, and now how our refrigerator is falling apart. They are known as large appliances. Let me throw in our vacuum cleaner and electric kettle. They are known as small appliances. They also stopped working. I tried to repair them, to no avail. Actually, I repaired the plug on the kettle and it kept going for a few months; then it gave up the ghost. Fran is more familiar with the small appliances in the kitchen that no longer work.
Now that I am retired, I hardly ever buy new clothes. But when I do, it is clear that the quality is very inferior. Buttons come off; seams and button holes unravel; shirts shrink after washing; zippers break; everything wears out more quickly.
I turned on my TV yesterday and saw about half the movie “Everything is Illuminated” based on the book by David’s Bronfman friend’s brother, Jonathan Safran Foer. I am not sure what Foer meant by the title “Everything is Illuminated.” Is it when someone “sees the light”? Is it like the electric light over the head of cartoon characters when they realize something?
My title is based on the realization that everything is falling apart. And I mean everything! The appliances we use, the clothing we wear, the buildings we live in, and the whole world around us. The most recent example of this phenomenon is the dying of our refrigerator. We moved into our condo five years ago, and were very impressed with the appliances that it contained. I always assumed that appliances would last a long time—maybe 20 or 30 years. (This is a figure I just made up, but it strikes me as perfectly plausible.) Turns out that within a few years after we moved in, the dishwasher, which must have been around 10 years old, died. We replaced the stove and the oven, but that was our choice, not because they fell apart.
Last week, the refrigerator started acting up. There was a problem with the ice maker. Then we noticed that the food was not as cold as it should be, in both the refrigerator and the freezer sections. For some time, the door to the refrigerator did not close properly because it needed a new gasket. But no new gaskets were available. They weren’t being made any more. The last time we had trouble with the ice maker, we called the appliance repair people and they came, and it cost a couple hundred dollars for their visit and a replacement ice maker.
This time we decided to get a new refrigerator. However, our refrigerator is only 28 inches deep, and most refrigerators are about 33 inches deep. It turns out that ours is a “special” refrigerator known as a “counter depth” refrigerator. It took several hours of research on the internet and calling appliance stores to learn that. And I also learned that it is next to impossible to get a real person on the phone when you call appliance stores. The recording goes on endlessly: press one for directions to the store; press two for hours; press eight if you know your party’s extension, and finally, press zero to speak to a customer service representative, but they are never available.
Buying a new appliance, like making any kind of purchase, is a challenge I relish. But this memoir is about how everything is deteriorating. I will write about how I shop for bargains in another piece.
I mentioned how our dishwasher fell apart, and now how our refrigerator is falling apart. They are known as large appliances. Let me throw in our vacuum cleaner and electric kettle. They are known as small appliances. They also stopped working. I tried to repair them, to no avail. Actually, I repaired the plug on the kettle and it kept going for a few months; then it gave up the ghost. Fran is more familiar with the small appliances in the kitchen that no longer work.
Now that I am retired, I hardly ever buy new clothes. But when I do, it is clear that the quality is very inferior. Buttons come off; seams and button holes unravel; shirts shrink after washing; zippers break; everything wears out more quickly.
Original Format
application/msword
Collection
Citation
Jacob Schlitt, “Everything is Deteriorating,” Autobiographical stories & other writing by Jacob Schlitt, accessed May 1, 2024, https://tsirlson.omeka.net/items/show/89.